Tuesday, October 27, 2020

A Word past Core

 

I just posted a youttube video of a class last week It was a day after the stress management class. And I'm struggling to find a word that describes what went on. Core development is a popular term, but it is not quite that. Anyway I watched the video of my class and realized something important was there. It is 90 minutes long with intro and an after class expose. I don't expect many people to be able to wade through the whole thing. But my feeling is some important stuff got transmitted. I am reminded of when I was first in Shingu Hikitsuchi sensei would off the mat give an impromtu lecture, which, I could not get because It was in Japanese. But my Mom sent me my tape recorder and Linda Holiday and I would start to tape the lectures, at first concealing the recording device. Finally when he found out we had recorded him, he would replay his talk, oftentimes transfixed as if he were hearing it for the first time even though it had come from him. We found out later he used to tape record Osensei and would later study the tapes. But he would hear things he himself had said and would then be moved to study those words. So I had a similar feeling with this video.

Like most people in Aikido of a certain generation, I have wondered what exactly Osensei meant by kototama. Hikitsuchi sensei taught kototama. And he daily chanted the Shinto prayers which are connected to kototama. When Robert Frager sensei and I overlapped on one visit, Hikitsuchi sensei taught a formal kototama class. Robert Nadeau sensei and I still go over Osensei's patterns of center/circle and fire/water along with the Su chant. I try to daily do the Amatsu Norito and Kami Goto as well as my own misogi pattern with the Su chant. Lately from my own personal experience of the past period of years(I can't say when this connection started) I've begun to notice a real connection between breath and sound/vibration. Which then of course feeds into movement.. I try to explain that in the video.

One thing that I try to highlight which I find is being lost in Aikido is that sense of primalness. If you hear Osensei chant on video he does not sound like a Shinto priest. There is a uniqueness to his sound, to his breath creating waves and other energy shapes, that has andprimal and at the same time otherworldly quality. I mean  in contrast to something that is made social, safe, and understandable, all of which are good in their own right. And I don't mean that it is dangerous, but it is primal. Hearing Osensei chant on video or Hikitsuchi sensei in the Shingu dojo of the seventies there was this almost raw quality that complemented the beauty, power, and intelligence of the sound. Again words fail me here. As much as the sounds(and accompanying movements) were practiced, there was a undescribableness to them. The sounds could make the hair on the back of your head stand up. And brought up a deep deep sense of heart and reverence. Again the words fail.

Much of this personally I have found interiorly in what you might call core. But it is past that term and even though intensely felt through the body it is more than just body. I guess what I'm struggling to say is that when we try to understand something we tame it, make it palatable. And what I'm trying to describe is never tame, never violent, loving but in a texture that words can't capture.

And my sense is that we think of kototama as a sound system. And anything that touches this original aliveness, or love, or primalness is kototama. Thus actions or movements that come from here, acts with power, are also kototama. In the last part of the video we have completed the movement section and go into discussion/lecture. I recount a basketball game I watched online in 2016. Warriors vs Oklahoma City Thunder. Overtime with seconds to go.. A rebound goes into Stephen Curry's hands for the last shot.. The game is tied. Everyone expects Curry to move closer to the hoop. But he without fear pulls up from 40 feet and nails what becomes the game winner. Now many players take that shot, but lo 4 or 5 years ago nobody did. But Curry making that shot gave me the great gift that in that moment I was just intensely glad to be alive. Not just because he had won the game. But the courage and largesse of that moment he created took me out of my normal state of just rooting for my team to win. The announder shouted out 'Bang!!!" not once but twice. I think Kevin Durant was so moved that he later joined the Warriors because he wanted to be a part of that. An enemy becomes a teammate. Aiki.....The next day there was an area Aikido gathering at the San Jose dojo. Everyone was talking about that shot. And even though it was not in a dojo, it was Aiki in another lineage. And I believe Osensei constantly produced moments like that. A purity beyond pure. A beauty beyond beautiful..My sense of that moment is irrational. I Can't explain the effect it had on me/ I can say being at the home birth of my daughter and catching her when she came out of her Mom tops that, but only that.


So here is the video. It's long and I didn't expect it to touch me the way it did. Hope you enjoy it.

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/Hx2Qh3aTLgs" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen></iframe>



Tuesday, October 13, 2020

Stress Management Class

 

I thought the other day that the dojo at large might be interested in a Stress Management Class. Aikido is the Way of harmony and stress is the result of when that harmony is lost or not there. So our way to deal with stress is to determne if that harmony with ourselves is there and if not how to realign to ourselves to be back in a harmonious state. If there are minor tweeks that harmony is re-established. If there are major factors then we may need to establish a new harmony and new methods for dealing with the new level.

For most of us these are challenging times. The pandemic has changed all our lives. Freedom we took for granted has been severely compromised or in some cases just lost. Going out to a restaurant just to relax, air out, enjoy a meal is so much harder. Travel is much more restricted. Social contact in most cases involves distancing and safety factors and in certain cases is now totally online.. These are major changes. Welcoming change is difficult as we all really prefer a comfort zone. When that zone is threatened, we react. We react--------stress. We have an upcoming election on November 3rd which will shape the direction of the country politically, economically, socially, and spiritually. It is going to be astronomically important as the results will shape your lives in ways perhaps we cannot now even imagine.

The physical dojo and the in person training experience has been interrupted. There is a great uncertainty when and whether even the post-pandemic period will even have a place for dojos. My own way was to treat the dojo as a Mom and Pop operation(in my case for the majority of my years with out the Mom, although that has in more recent years shifted).People like Anno sensei taught for years but it was a very personal experience that had to do with business than with their connection to Aiki. And their connection to Aiki was their connection to students. I have always trusted that feeling and my inclination has always been to distance myself from the more the bigger the better is due to getting more and more. You can lose your humanity and your perspective due to that. But at the same time I can agonize over past business decisions or non-decisions that have put the dojo at risk financially. Why could I not have planned for this? Truth be told the dojo succeeded in a meager and small way that seemed to be sustainable so I just rode it. But when things like the pandemic hit, the racial unrest, the political corruption, the economic uncertainty, that personal safety zone is destroyed and a new way of looking at things like economic and social


stability for the dojo must be examined. I thank those of you who have realized these issues with the dojo and through emails or persona discussion have come up with ideas and suggestions.


So my thoughts on a stress management class. Online through our dojo Zoom link we use for classes would be easy to do. It could be videoed so those not able to attend might be able to follow and see what it's about. It could be one class or several or lead to a a regular class on a weekly basis. What might we cover?

1. Some meditation. Just grounding in silence or breath has been known to help with stress and health issues. As one of my teachers once said, "More important than what you eat is what is eating you." Meditation can give you balance and perspective to help you cope and even better help you or me find a better level of ourselves that can deal with the massive changes and restrictions we are being hit with.

2. Some movement practices to help us practice some of the benefits we get from meditation like grounding, breathwork, being able to hold a calm space in motion. Not technically aikido technique, but essential to the true nature of what Aikido is. Osensei constantly talked about the "True Aikido".

3. Perhaps some discussion as a group so we share what is going on for us and what challenges we face. We can then share what helps each of us. There is as the Warriors have taught us, a"Strength in Numbers''.

4. Hopefully we(and the dojo) come out of things better and we can move forward together.


My thoughts are this can be an evening class on a Tuesday or a Thursday 7:30 to 8:30pm.Online of course. So let this ruminate. I'll pick a date for a class and we will go on from there.


Be safe and well......